Introducing my McCousin Princess Hazel of Hampstead and the Scottish Royal Family's dog Dharma McPoodle, a slimmer and much improved version of the Queen's corgi.

Here we are , walking the wee doggie around the palace grounds, in Frosty Thortonhall, Glasgow for the annual Royal Family Channukah festivities.

Dharma is sporting her very own House of Fraser electric blanket doggie coat which we prefer to keep at a sensible 76 degrees / Medium heat, which keeps her nice and toasty. We don't believe in extravagence. Dharma is doing a fine job of keeping an eye out for fierce invaders or stray snowballs.

My McCousin, Princess Hazel is smiling because she is so happy to be breathing real Scottish fresh air rather than her usual London smog, which is free in Scotland for those who are physically in the country at the time. Reminds me of the time when I tried to import real Scottish fresh air for the sake of my complexion, to New York, a very polluted city badly in need of such a fine thing. I packaged it in large glass containers which I had to hold carefully on my lap as they are very fragile for the full 7 endless hours of the flight. When I arrived, drained and exhausted, the customs folk had the nerve to keep them as they thought they were some mysterious toxic terrorist gas, as if , and I was forced to leave them in Newark. No doubt the folks in Newark are enjoying my fresh air right now, what a waste.