"Look Damien, don't get alarmed but the Bull is a tad upset and so are the butterflies and they would like their bodies back and they don't want to be art anymore

They said they don't want to let you down or embarrass you for the show so they will let sleeping dogs lie for now, but they would like to have their full body parts reinstated the day the show closes or they have asked someone who will remain nameless but happens to be a very important royal personnage with a lot of influence in high places except maybe with Mick J, to report you to the RSPCA( the Royal Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) where dismemberment of animals including butterflies comes with a 5-10 year jail sentance.

His frown got deeper. I smiled sweeter and wider to avoid suspicion.

But Damien, it is Ok. End of an Era is true, you said it yourself, it has come. We all of us have a brillaint idea to save the day and save the animals at the same time, plus save all the bad karma you are amassing which would result you coming back as a decapitated bull in a Damien Hirst art installation.

"What's the idea, out with it lass, eeh by gum," DH said, which proves you can't take the Northerner out of the artist so easily.

"It is decided. You are to do Balloons! Balloon calves, balloon sharks, balloon butterflies. It is going to be huge and Jeff Koons will green with your new pieces. It will be huge and all the animals will be saved!!! Will you do it? Just say yes and then you can go back to signing the books and opening invitations for the models. If you say no, you are looking at 5-10."

SP I'll do it but not a word to Koons about this. Maybe I will do diamond studded balloons, in keeping with my new Judgement Day piece..., we can discuss the details over scones in the country..."

his brain was whirling ten to the dozen already and the animals let out a collective sigh, well a flap of wings and the bull let his tongue fall to the other side, a wee sign of gratitude to me, thier princess.
Another day of hard work saving the world, successfully completed for the SP. I turned round to thank DH, but he was hiding under the gallery reception table, blowing up some kids balloons he had found and then we heard that dry squeaky sound of someone manipulating and squeezing the balloons. I guess that is why he is the most famous living artist around. You heard it first here.

Run and see the show everyone before the balloon phase kicks in!