Another chap's sign was so enormous his whole face and body was hidden, nice one.

It read - we can no longer accept human sacrifices to the Demi- Gods of the free market temple.

Who knows what on earth it means but it was politically vague and super cool and I wanted it for Trout Pond, not sure if I could fit it on the bike, or Linda's Beetle, but still that is logistics.

Loads of people had really cool signs except me.

End War and Feed The Poor. A little girl held up a sign bigger than her, lucky thing.

Everyone who was anyone had a large sign

This lady was proudly holding up , Teachers are 99%.

I felt quite naked simply repeating everything the leader said without a decent sign. Donna Karan should sell them for folks who forget theirs or were too lazy to make one themselves.

Err Excuse me fine Sir Mr Speaker but there is already a strong movement at Trout Pond gathering momentum as we speak.

We meet next week at 2pm please bring your own signs, vegetarian sandwiches and swimsuits, caps not required, towels will be provided, but you have to share them to save energy costs, I piped in, to large applause. And if you are sexy you can come back to me for a shower and back rub.

Boy, this Occupy thing is fun and could potentially lead to a few hot dates.

Meanwhile down at the old windmill the crowds had assembled and The Occupation was going strong

Everyone agreed by shaking their fingers in the sky, to meet at different locations each week to give the movement a chance to grow across the hayfields, beaches and plains of the Hamptons.




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We posed for the two wee lassies walking around the pond and all three agreed Occupy Trout Pond a huge success.

We agreed we would meet there at the same time next week but next time bring cheese sandwiches and blankets and a sign saying Trout Pond is for Everyone and a spare fluffy towel for any potential brave swimming revolutionaries, who could handle the icy spring water.

Free Trout Pond! I shouted.
Free Trout Pond! My friends shouted after me in a nice echo. The girls looked at us as if we were bonkers.

Before we went to the appointed windmill on the Long Wharf , the girls did a dry run, called Occupy Trout Pond.

I lay across the deck like a slug, listening to George Harrison on Spotify, as it is a sun trap there, and then jumped into the pond so I could physically embody the occupation by swimming around with the giant turtle whilst calling and repeating a few slogans and waving my fingers in the air to signify I agreed with myself. Sadly no one was at the pond to appreciate my efforts. We had no signs either so Laura looked pensive staring at the water, silently preparing the next political mantra,which we all considered the next best thing and not as much work as slogging inside making a sign instead of enjoying the fresh air and fall colors of the pond.

Don't forget to make a decent sign and say something original SP, I will be watching and keeping the crowds in order and the polis ( Glasweigan for police) at bay

Hurry it starts very soon. He wuffed annoyingly, Bossy Paws.

SP, it is Occupy Hamptons today, you better stop stealing all the free food and asking for more cheese from Art at the Sag Harbor Farmers Market and go and make a sign and do your bit to save the world.

The wee duggie, had a Poranj Disorient hoodie, obviously just back from the Playa too. He was a bossy wee mutt chasing me away from all the free goodies and tastes so he can eat them all himself no doubt. Who wants to occupy when you can nosh and schmooze instead?

A huge loss to us all poor Steve Jobs left us, only 56.

Just like the death of Princess Diana, another tragic loss, it seems all the press was consumed with Steve Jobs. The Apple shop windows were covered with messages on post it's and flowers. Here The New Yorker has Jobs waiting for his sign in position in heaven, whilst Peter checks his IPad for the details. Will he designing The IPhone 5 for all the angels now? They surely could benefit from a time management smart phone. I think heaven probably needs a face lift by now and a glass cube at the entrance and a magnificent glass staircase to lead you up to the pearly gates would not go amiss. Our loss is their gain. He changed the world as we know it and has set standards that we all must strive to achieve.
In his Stamford speech he said, "Don't settle." I will take that to mean SP go for the True Love connection and nothing less. A message for us all.

Happy 5772 to one and all.

SP, this is to be your year and guess what we saw your name in the Book of Life, under best dressed Shul Attendees and very high in the Most Fervent Prayer Category. You are in, go have fun now so you have something to apologize for next year.

The Tokyo Seven Robot told us you bought the leather dress, if you can't sin in that, there is simply no hope for you, so go enjoy and Chag Sameach, one and all.

Their mechanical ears whirled round and round in the most jolly fashion.

And a happy new year to one and all from The SP.

In you go now Missy, he glared rather forcefully, for my taste.

He took a step in my direction and hoisted me into the store,by the scruff of my neck, where the staff had laid down the red carpet for me and picked out some Kol Nidre knockout dresses.

Half an hour and $599 poorer I ran out with an Italian GF mauve leather dress in hand. The warrior smiled at me sweetly when I left and gave me the thumbs up sign.

"See you for Sukkoht! Have an easy fast and happy 5772. He will surely inscribe you now, you will make it for glamor alone."

I rushed home excited about my grand entrance to Shul when I remembered you don't wear leather on Yom Kippur. Darn. That heimeshe warrior robot could have warned me, rotter.
Ah well it is a great date dress and after all this fasting and prayers my date luck must surely improve.

"Oy Va Yoy, SP, do we have some fabulous bargains inside for you, my dear, step inside,Ma'am.

According to my watch the fast doesn't start for one hour so plenty time to shop. Don't you need something new for Shul tonight? You must make a big statement so you get noticed otherwise you may miss entry into the Book.

A Jewish Robot warrior, who knew. One thought all the Jews had moved to the upper west side, but not all it seemed or the owner had given his warrior some fine coaching.

On the way to services I noticed a Japanese warrior was standing by The window of Tokyo 7

Certainly one way to stop Shop lifting.

Perhaps they were strolling elegantly through the park on a first date.

Together but apart, no holding hands yet. The Tree Lady had fared way better than me as her Date had turned up, on time.

As the many branches below her legs would make buying shoes quite pricy, she had gone for the bare footbranch option, and despite this she walked tall and proud. Her hand outstretched as if beckoning her date to seize it and seal the deal.

I wished her all the best with her new beau, making a mental note that walking barefoot in the park was obviously back in again.

During the few important days between Yom Kippur I had a blind date in Madison Square Park.

He was an hour and twenty minutes, slept in for 1pm date, great start, so I had to chance to enjoy this brand new sculpture.

Adam and Eve, Man and Wife, two souls descended from trees, were frozen mid stride in the clearing by the back of the park.

The bay glowed a soft,milky orange pink hue.

A perfect sunset must mean a perfect year. My conscience was clear and I was ready to go out and bungle things up again.
Maybe He would answer my fervent prayers and lead me to my Mr. Right, or at least I might make it to a second date. Things can only improve at least, especially as I made a point of going to Services several times in highly visible outfits so He would spot me in the repenting crowds.

When the sun finally set, at 6.20pm, I knew as I had been counting down for hours, I leaped into the sky for the pure joy of it being over!

The first mouthful after a fast is always so delicious. I was free!

Like many good Israeli's I decided to spend the second half of Yom Kippur on the beach with my cousin.

We diligently counted every minute we had left to fast and I did some meditation to add to the righteous mood of the day.

Three violinists serenaded our prayers with joyous hebrew tunes

In the Shul of New York, Rabbi Burt Seigal believes Shul should be a joyous time, even Yom Kippur. When we repent we are to repent not being the best person we could have been at all times. Also we are not to be hard on ourselves and relax knowing Him( or Her) up there will forgive us. Works for me. In the US things are more laid back in general, one of the reasons I moved here!