Wee Doggy Carmel caught my eye, slinking out the back door, where all the waiters were standing smoking and catching up on the day's news. I thought I heard the words dogs, pigs and viscous war from a large handsome beefy Italian , but I knew I was totally just being paranoid now.

"Carmel, my messenger doggie wee pal, come and get a yummy raw organic veggie chew from your SP, for being so brave to come and tell me this scary news. Don't worry you will be fine. You are totally safe with me, I will never let anything happen to you. Come and pose for my world famous comedy blog. Remember what happened to Rufus, he is a big movie star now."

So Carmel ate my chew, believe it or not, I guess he was totally starving as he had been in hiding for a month and even posed for a photo with me, in hope of starting off his own movie career. After all, I told him, you are way cuter than Rufus.