I was walking over to the Lower East Side Landmark Sunshine Cinema to see Waltz with Bashir, number one movie on the SP hitlist and I heard a loud booming sonorous voice coming from on top of a pile of junk.

"Oieyy, you SP, slow down a moment."

I looked around but saw only a dead tv screen and a few discarded coffee cups.

"Who is requesting my royal presence when I have a Variety Screening to catch," I said in my most firm but friendly voice.

"It's me Santa. Me with the gold sax. They cut me in two and they are selling me as junk for $4.99. It is an injustice, I am on the scrap heap, just because it is January and no one wants me now and everyone had a miserable Christmas because half the country got laid off and the other half think they are going to be next, Santa is junk,no longer needed. Children's dreams are scrapped when the parents can not pay bills. Do Something. You can't leave me here. I am not some discount trinket. I am SANTA. I MATTER. People need me even when they think all is lost.

If you can find just one Santa out there who can show you that honest folks dreams are still alive, set me free!Hurry as the gas heater is roasting me behind."