Rudolph, I am late for work, can you make this snappy, I smiled at him sweetly so no passerbys could see some sinister interchange was about to take place.

Ladies and Gentleman, behold Rudolph the Radiant Rat. He may look scary but he is a sweet kid once you get to know him.

He just asked me to send you folks a message - he said please keep throwing the food scraps away in the trains as he and all his buddies are all getting very well fed and growing nice, big and strong from the ever increasing garbage left on the ground. He used to be a teeny weeny rat and look at him now!

So Keep New York Filthy is his slogan.

"That's right Missy Princess, all those scraps are gladly received and every day I thank my lucky stars I grew up in the Big Apple and not some clean city like Toronto or Singapore, where my brother rats are starving and ill nourished. Amen."