Meet Aunty Mabel, she has been playing the same three notes for years.

You too will soon learn to appreciate
Her doleful ditty.

"Finally dinner is here. Let me sharpen my knives.

Princess, you look a tad skinny. I hope you have not been dieting, we have a lot of mouths to feed here and the thought of blue blood has all the household licking their lips."

"Who me, dieting? Not on your nelly. It is the rag and bone skinny jeans, in your days the women wore corsets, today skinny jeans hide a lot of evils. But why such an interest in my diet? It is nice to show an interest in what I eat, but no need to worry about me I have a reservation at 9 pm and will be stuffing my face about 9.05pm. Now Hairy One, no need to grab me so tightly I know you are excited for me to meet the other " Houslings" as they seem to be called . But must you grip my hand so fiercely?

SP , leave grandpa alone. He is stuffed after his supper.

Follow me please. Forgive my nightgown stains, just a few leftovers from our tasty dinner.

Well young lassie, did you have very raw steak as that looks like blood stains on your gown? And you are awful peely wally, pale. Staying up too late? Homework , Netflicks ? Facebook ? A lovely girl like you needs her beauty sleep. I hope grandma is not giving you too many chores.

Chores! Humph ! My main chore is catching, I mean, preparing supper .
Come and meet Hairy Harry. He is one of our cooks here.

Gramps was slumped in a chair. But he was not snoring.

He looked quite out of it , I can't imagine my screams would bother him, he is too far gone himself. I gave him a smile but he remain slumped. I guess he over ate.

"Good evening Madame Witch, may I mention your black gown and just got out of bed hairdo are very fetching.

Thank you for the gracious welcome. I am of course a little hungry but it is nothing a roasted eggplant and mozzarella pasta down the road can't handle. I do look forward to meeting the Houselings. Where should I start?"

"First is grandpa. He is sleeping soundly as he always does, after his delicious dinner tonight. Please try not to wake him. If you do scream as you go through the house, keep the volume down as he is a light sleeper and gets very testy if woken unnecessarily."

"Ssshhhhhh.... There he is at his chair, dear thing."

As I tentatively opened the door to the Whaling Museum haunted house, my hands were shaking.

What evil, foul, bad breath, half dead zombies were awaiting me?
I did not have to long to wait for the first creature. A ghastly, manky grey haired witch floated down the bannister.
"Welcome dearest Princess. The Haunted Houselings have been eagerly waiting your arrival, the fateful night has come at last. I do hope you are hungry. Word is you have a penchant for the Bodiless One's soup, divine , isn't it? The good news is we have more tasty surprises in store for you . Hopefully you did not spoil your appetite outside. HAR ! HAR!"

Hmmmm..... I mean of course one always likes a decent welcome, but the witch's words had a sinister, fishy undertone I did not quite like. I mean of course I was hungry, as basically I am permanently hungry and live from meal to meal. When I am eating one meal, I am busy planning the next. Isn't everyone like that? Yes, I enjoyed the broth or you could say I survived the broth unscathed. But what did she mean? Was she planning to hijack my dinner reservation at Tutto? Or join me? I can't imagine an evil witch at your table would encourage handsome strange men who also happened to be eating at your restaurant to befriend you , never mind try and take you home if they saw that was the company you keep. Despite these misgivings the Princess kept her cool.



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