I gasped, looking up at the ceiling frantically for the Green Jesus Business Man, my hands trying to steady my fall, but all that was there now was a few silver stars , a red moon and a giant floating lipstick. Then I went out cold.

My last thought was Yikes, they must have spiked the water too, hope I get out of here alive..... that lipstick is a pretty color wonder if they have it in a handbag size too...

"Him, Him, him, the crosseyed geek in that silver mask thing with the gold pointy ears and the red pinocchio nose, he doesn't look my type at all." I shook my head at the Jesus Green Business Man in disbelief. He had to be kidding surely.

"Kiss him and see what happens." The voice called from above me, he seemed very sure that this was what I had to do.

" He is a Manly Beast, one kiss and all will be understood. Do it, SP, Do it , do it now, looks aren't everything.You'll see." He instructed.

So I kissed him.

I had come looking for trouble, everyone else was asleep, the barman and his gal were making out like crazy, no one knew me, what was there to loose, he did seem like a happy chap at least, a red grin from ear to ear forever painted on his face . He turned his cheek expectantly like he had known all along that this was going to happen, it was quite manly in a funny kind of a way. At least he did not have spikes and tinfoil was a step up from the razor sharp hellraiser spikes that gave you a nasty rash for sure, this was a big improvement obviously from the One Taste Wear Black Only Nutjob. I mean he was docile and well tempered. Or so it seemed.

Then everything went black, I saw stars, stars on my cheeks, stars in the sky, was this what falling in love was all about? Was he the One?

How could I take him on the plane to McMummy and Big Daddykins, back to our wee McCastle in Scotland with his odd silver mask and gold pointy ears, people would never understand, even a Doggy Date made more sense than this peculiar Creature of the Night, a million things flashed through my head and then I felt myself falling, falling, falling.

"Princess to your right. He is waiting for you. Your Manly Man."

A voice called from above in the form of a Green Business Man Jesus Dummy, suspended from the ceiling, palms outstetched although offering me salvation, maybe he was.

"Never mind her. She does not belong in here. Let's have a quick snog before they all wake up. C'mere love."

The barman had lost all interest in me. Typical, the only ones finding love in this divebar worked here.

Another Bum Steer, dejected I made my way to the door.

"SP, where are you going? Stay and have one of our speciality cocktails, guaranteed to orbit you right into outer space, my dear little one. One drink never harmed no one. Don't mind those others, they are just resting in between dance numbers, they will be up dancing again momentarily, I promise." She smiled, rather disarmingly I thought.

Despite her smiles she did not fool the SP, I saw right away she was not sweet one little bit nor was her smiley boyfriend, something did not smell right about this joint and it was not just the Big Banana Man.

Golly Gosh, it was catching. Everyone was comatose in this joint, was it something in the drinks, in the air, in the music, I was starting to feel a bit sleepy myself.

All of a sudden a dizzy turn took me over and I felt myself sinking into the floor. I only drank the water as well!

I have to get out of here FAST.

All of a sudden the dive bar was becoming less friendly, the patrons did not look too well either.

This gloved creature seemed in some kind of a trance, but was it a good trance or a bad trance,I couldn't tell, whatever it was I did not like to interrupt so I stepped politely over her. The SP has impeccable manners if nothing else.

But then curiosity got the better of me.

"Mam, Are you ok? You seem a bit peely wally( Scottish for pale) did your guy dump you, why so sad and doon in the mooth?" I gave her a wee push to see if she was alive or deador maybe just in a drunken stupour.

"Scuse me Missus, but I think I know you, are you the SP? I love your blog, read it every night, fancy a Big Banana Feet Boogie?" A cheerful yellow voice called overf , distracting me from my important reunion with the Lady of the Box.

Some of you may know this but I have a violent aversion to Bananas of all shapes and sizes and strengths. The texture, the color , the smell, makes me sick.

''Keep away, Banana Thing off you go and dance with an Orange or a Mango, not me." Fortunately he could not move very fast in his Banana outfit so I lost him as he waddled after me. Holding my breath from the noxious smell, I hid amongst the revellers.

"Yes, it is me. The Lady of the Box,I am still here and we were meant to meet tonight. Love is in the Air for us all."

I was pleased my Lady was no longer just a Hand coming out a Very Sexy box on Canal Street subway but had set herself free from that black box and now she had grown from a lonesome hand to an arm. Adorned with tinsel and lights and looking very festive too, ready for action like us all.

(For those of you who are new to this crazy blog, scroll down to last February and Halloween last year and see my earlier adventures with the Lady of the Box, my Halloween Pumpkin Verizon Shop Window Lady)

"Hey is that the SP, don't be scared, we are all just freaks, come in and join the fun. He may or may not be here but for sure he is not standing in that alley," a friendly Freak who seemed to know me from somewhere called from the belly of the dive bar.

I stumbled upon a mysterious Blue Lady adorned with buttons and coins. She seemed very composed and frozen in stillness and meditative thought.

She was at a dark doorway at the end of the alley.

"You have come to the right place. Enter. " She commanded. " $20 please and step inside, all your heart desires is within these four walls. Are you alone as only you can enter, we have been waiting for you."

Gosh, this is sounding a bit like that scene in Eyes Wide Shut. Should I go in?

I stood hesitating at the door for what seemed like eternity.

That night there was a slight mist and dampness and the air was fresh beckoning me out to play - I decided it was time to take things into my own hands and I set off looking for trouble. I knew not where I was headed but after all in New York City, it shouldn't be that hard to get up to mischief.

Where is he, is he out there tonight? Watching paint dry at home is no way to find a soulmate so I disappeared into the heat of the night.....

Walking to work the next day I was so deep in thought that I did not see yet another Doggy Dater, till he walked bang into me.

He looked Manly but he had no interest in me as he was on his own Doggy Date, carrying his beloved in his little brown leather satchel.

"Excuse me, Sir but it is only 9am, is it not a bit early to be on a date?" I enquired, all the while thinking ditch the dog and go for me.

"Not in the slightest" he replied in a gruff tone, "I love this quiet time we share, we walk to work together and she notices everything and sniffs around and it is so sweet, now please get out my way as we are late, SP." Typical New Yorker, he had not one more minute to spare to schmooze or chat and he was off. His Little Doggy Date gave me a stern look," Don't even think of it," the look said, "This hunk is all mine, keep off."

Things are getting rough when a tiny terrier puts you in your place by 9am on a brisk autumn morning.

As the sun set I pondered her wise words, she was right!

I was not Cinderella, I am the Scottish Princess, teaming up with the Pink Fairy Godmother is a faux pas, a mistake, a mixing up of roles, he/she belongs in another story, not my story.

Yes the day after Halloween surprisingly enough I was in such a good mood I decided to go and frolic in Connecticut and share the good news with Miss Laura, my night was a big success!

"Jackpot, Girlfriend, just tell me one thing was he a Manly Man, did he ravish you and sweep you off your feet, did you swoon in his arms and melt into love, surrendering into a sublime blissful union and state of nirvana?" She asked me with a smile on her face.

"Er what, what is that, I never experienced all that nirvana stuff. I thought that only happened in other people's blogs, do you think love like that, David Deida Third Stage Love really exisits or is it just a fantasy that none of us will ever actually taste? We just had a quick goodnight slobbery gropey snog and then the Pink Fairy Godmother magiced himself, herself whatever she is off into the night, nothing too dramatic."

"Girl, You need a Manly Man - keep looking he is not the One. Get out there, you will not find him playing in the leaves, off you go, shoo!"

My Pink Fairy Godmother! Decision made.

See ya! I hope your Halloween was as fun as mine, say no more.

The guys on Kostume Kult totally rock. Hold on, look a bit closer.

I can't believe it right at the very front of the Kostume Kult float was a very old and familiar friend of mine.Everything looked blurry but one face shone out into the night.

Do you recognize her/him? In pink. Yes. I know you know exactly who I mean. Clue. Wand.

"I take care of all the orgasms around here tonight, if you want to guarantee yourself a good time. I am medically certified and will handle you most carefully."

Gosh, Dr Love was back, I thought he was long gone ages ago. He was getting very familiar with his stethoscope too I might add.

Choices, choices. I LOVE HALLOWEEN.

"Wait I am from Planet Zorg, your very own homeland. Space Princess. Come with me."

Gosh all this choice at last, I wish it was Halloween every night. My costume must be working I guess.

"A tribal warrior who is a Superior Man is what you need Dearie, step right up next to me, forget about these others, they know not of the mysterious tantrics secrets, follow me."

Wow, now we are talking, I am coming right now. You are Totally Yummy.

"Threesome at Planet Zorg?"

I figured it was worth asking at least, who is that gal anyway?

"Don't even think about it lads, this Pirate is taken."

"She's right," Dr Love said, "anyway we have got each other, we don't need her and lookee here a handsome Pirate from the Caribean. Over here, mister, Ahoy there!"

And so the spirit of Halloween reigned on for one more year.

"Happy Halloween everyone, go have fun, tonight is the night!" She ordered.

"Too late the SP is on the float and is heading into the crowds." The beautiful Halloween Ice Maiden called out.