My favourite band the Beatles were performing on a terrace for the Smalto Real Estate Global Something Group, singing all my favorite songs... yes .. and ...

A man in a green kilt with matching sock ribbons... yes ... and then ...

I was catching some rays at the beach just before the Scottish Enterprise Government Mipim Lunch at the Carlton,quite happy, happy as a sandman you could say, when I noticed...

"Hey,SP,Meatballs told us you met the Sandman's uncle in France, what's the scoop? All of us dogs want to know but can you make it quick as I am training for the Marathon."

"Sure, Honeysuckle, love the pawwear by the way. Well last month I went to Cannes and I was walking up the Croisette to the Grand Palais when all of a sudden I saw..."

On that somber note I took back to the pavement to see that the Doggy Fashionistas were out in force as always and now a new line had come in,Doggy Trainers or sneakers for the Healthier Dogs who run for the purpose of proper exercise. This doggy is ready for the treadmill and if he is going to follow a pack of wolves or dogs for that matter at least he looks fabulous.

When I arrived at the Guggenheim, I was confronted with a pack of stuffed paper mache or something like that fierce fake wolves hurtling at full speed, the way only wolves can, into a plate of glass. The piece should have simply been called"Dopes."

The message was people never learn and we just follow the leader blindly even to our own destruction. It may have also had a deeper meaning about the harming effects of communism and blind doctrine. As the artist lives in Brooklyn he is quite safe to say what he wants, unlike the foreign journalists in Tibet, who can not make any comments as they are not even allowed access. Where is the progress, one wonders?

$1 later I decided to move on, basically because they stopped dancing and I had no choice but to keep moving. I'll catch that hot Chinease show at the Guggenheim everyone is raving about if I leave now, I consoled myself, and anyway these lads are not boyfriend material even if they are super fit with thebiggest muscles I ever saw,my 92 year old granny would never allow it. So off I went.

How about an escape from High Culture to Street Culture and watch the breakdancers at the Times Square subway. Gosh they are even harder to photograph than dogs.

A great diversion from taxes and Doggy insults is the new Roman wing in the Met.

Five minutes later I was wondering what to do next.

Only a few steps away and Doggy Couture was out in force in the park. This four legged friend barked me over to him and as I was admiring his Burberry jacket and leggings he woofed in my ear,

"Meatballs told me your life is as interesting as a piece of wet cardboard and he'd rather watch paint dry than listen to you."

Yup, the day was shaping up nicely.

Ah Central Park in the Spring time. Here I am about to head off to a day of blockbuster art shows, at MOMA, the Met and the Guggenheim, anything to avoid actually doing my own taxes. That Meatballs was mighty rude taking off like that before I had hardly got through five minutes of news. But being a hardy Scottish Princess I can't let these things upset me. My life is very exciting, everyone knows that, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this here blog.

What,you want more pictures of Zenya the topless dancer, you are fed up with my smiling mug, well not today.

As I was walking down Broadway waiting for some exciting diversion to divert me from the thought of my own taxes, which were not half as organized as Reid's, a handsome doggy called Meatballs stopped me in his tracks.

"SP,"he wuffed,"you have not written your blog in a month, what is up with that? Lazy, too busy, fallen in love, been in prison, travelled the world, what is your excuse? The Doggy Community demands an answer."

"Well,"I said, "all and none of the above, have you got ten minutes to hear what has been happening in my life? It won't take long and it is pretty exciting, I got made a partner in work, I went to a property conference in France, I met the Sandman's uncle, I bought a great new dress at Intermix ...." I droned on and on but when I looked down Meatballs was gone. Ach, dogs are busy too, especially New York doggies. He was probably heading off for a Doggy Date or to do his taxes, anything better than listening to me.

April means one thing that puts fear of God into most of us.

TAXES. My friend Joey does his taxes himself with Taxbusters.com or is it Turbotax.com. I mean that pile looks pretty straightforward, he assured me his taxes only took him twenty five minutes,I am not so sure myself.

The other side of his living room looked like this. I was dying to hoover up the whole lot or run through the meticulous piles like a wee lassie running through wet forest leaves but I thought if Ivalued this friendship at all it probably would not be the smartest thing to do. So I huffed at them quietly unobtrusively from the corner of the room, I think one taxi receipt flew on top of a restaurant receipt, but that was about it. Kinda lame and not nearly enough fun so I went for a walk to see what the streets of New York had to offer me before an accidentally on purpose calamity struck Joey's living room office floor.

Gosh look at all those folk rushing out the museum like me before he grabs them for this karma yoga art color tape job, who can blame them, I feel sorry for the ones that got nabbed. They will probably be in the museum for weeks. Ah well at least that will probably store them enough good Karma to eat a steak or something like that.

Oh oh he is pointing at me. Yikes.

"I'd love to stay and help Swami but I have a hot date with Sweeny Todd to see Sweeny Todd tonight. I have to get ready, he is already upset he did not win the oscar and like you he is not the type that you want to get too much more upset."

I scooted out the back entrance of Moma quite relieved to have just a fun date with a murderer to look forward to instead of taping up the whole museum floor.

I don't think he can see me from up here thankfully.

Gosh would you look at all that Karma yoga, the Swami has got these poor folk who probably thought they were going to have a relaxing afternoon at the museum recovering the whole entrance steps with different color tape. Yikes that will take hours.

I'm off before he sees me, that is not how I want to spend my day. See Ya!

Meanwhile at Moma all hands are on deck frantically preparing the way for the new hit show"Color Chart:Reinventing Color 1950 to Today. Wow that sculpture looks a tad like Swami Vishnu Devananda, how did he get down here. I hope he is not going to make me clean the Mens toilets at Moma that is quite a job.

I scooted down the steps el rapido in case he saw me.

"Hey the Alt Oscars psot was fab, what was that lady wearing at the end, did she win an Oscar at least. The Dog Community liked Blackie too and we have invited him to New York so he can wear a cool Juicy Couture coat like me. I love New York because you can wear anything you like."

The Can Can lady was very brave and caused her own diversion with a highly risque dance that blew the socks off the Rats shenanigans.